Four Months of Not Smoking

I’ve now hit the four-month non-smoking mark. I am astounded. It has been far easier than I ever imagined. The only bumps in the road have been intense cravings for chocolate and sweets and my extreme irritability. I thought I’d be a sleepy, ditzy, non-smoking shrew and that hasn’t happened yet. Well, at least not the sleepy and ditzy parts.

The best thing I’ve noticed since I quit is how good I smell. I’ve become a Victoria’s Secret body spray junkie. I cannot spray on enough Amber Romance or Vanilla Lace to suit me. And I sniff my wrists all day long. Ditto on my hair. Now that is doesn’t smell like cigarette smoke, throughout the day I catch myself grabbing a lock and putting it to my nose. It’s becoming a nervous tic. My coffee tastes fabulous. So does everything else. I’ve fallen in love with raw oysters all over again. I’ve been having two dozen at a sitting. I no longer wheeze when I lie flat. And my energy level has soared.

I smoked for 32 years. At this stage of the quit, I’m noticing now that being a non-smoker is no longer an all-consuming pursuit. It’s just becoming a part of who I am. I don’t think about it all the time although I continue to visit the QuitNet website frequently but that’s just fun. I’ve made some online friends there.

Becoming a non-smoker has been more than simply withdrawing from nicotine. It’s stopping a deeply ingrained habit that influenced many aspects of my life. I was continually, albeit subconsciously, thinking of when and where I was having my next cigarette. I also had to make sure I had a steady supply of smokes. I couldn’t leave the house without checking to make sure I had my current pack and a backup pack in my purse. And a lighter, of course. Smoking is what got me out of bed in the morning. After eight or so hours of not having one, when I woke up I immediately thought of smoking. It also influenced other choices in my life from who to date to vacation destinations. My yoga buddies have dreamed up a scheme for us to do a yoga retreat in Costa Rica within a couple of years. When the idea came up, I couldn’t picture myself sneaking out of a yoga resort to smoke a cigarette.

There are also many smoking triggers that have to be ignored or reprogrammed. Not smoking with coffee, after meals or with drinks. Not smoking while driving or during work breaks. Not smoking when I’m nervous, angry or upset. Just recently, as I returned home from a walk I pictured myself stepping out on the patio to have a cigarette. Oops. My brain clearly hasn’t reprogrammed to non-smoking mode yet. I find it odd that I have thoughts but not urges to smoke. It’s not at all what I expected when I quit.

Another thing I never expected was to see quitters falling like dominoes on the QuitNet website. I really wanted to succeed but was afraid to fail. I thought I didn’t have the willpower to quit smoking. I’ve been dismayed to see people who have been quit much longer than me cave to temptation. Go figure. The reasons they give don’t really matter. Either you stopped smoking or you smoke. I know that I will never be out of the woods. I know many people who have quit for years only to take it up again. If you think you can smoke just one, you’re in trouble. As they say on QuitNet.com, Not One Puff Ever. NOPE.